Myths & Facts

Myth: Guys cannot be sexually assaulted.
Fact: Both guys and girls can be sexually assaulted. 1 in 20 men and 1 in 5 women in Australia over the age of 15 years have experienced sexual violence in their lifetime.
(Australian Bureau of Statistics. (2006). Personal safety survey (Reissue), Canberra)
Myth: Girls provoke sexual assault by the way they dress or act.
Fact: No person provokes or asks for sexual assault. Girls dress and/or flirt to feel attractive. Perpetrators are responsible for their own actions.
Myth: Girls enjoy being sexually assaulted.
Fact: Any form of sexual violence is frightening and humiliating and no-one enjoys an experience like that.
Myth: Most sexual assaults occur at night time in dark alleys.
Fact: Many sexual assaults occur in the daytime and in the home of the victim.
Myth: Most sexual assaults are committed by strangers.
Fact: Most sexual assaults (80%) are committed by a person known to the victim.
(Australian Bureau of Statistics. (2006). Personal safety survey (Reissue), Canberra)
Myth: Guys cannot be sexually assaulted because they can defend themselves.
Fact: Many people (guys and girls) who are sexually assaulted are so traumatised by a sexual assault that they freeze and may be unable to react. This is a biological function and is not something that a person has control over.
Myth: Having an unwanted sexual act which the person did not consent to is OK if it's with your girlfriend/boyfriend.
Fact: Having an unwanted sexual act with your girlfriend/boyfriend without consent is still sexual assault and therefore against the law.
Myth: A guy cannot be sexually assaulted by a girl.
Fact: Although males are usually sexually assaulted by another male, some are assaulted by females.
Myth: Someone who has been drinking or taking drugs is asking to be sexually assaulted
Fact: Being under the influence of alcohol or drugs can prevent you from giving consent to sexual acts with another person. It is a crime to have sex with a person who cannot give consent due to being underage, intoxicated, unconscious, asleep or that has a decision-making disability.
Myth: Guys only sexually assault others because they are frustrated or they cannot control themselves.
Fact: Some sexual assaults are well planned in advance and do not involve a loss of control on the perpetrator's part.
Myth: Sexual assaults from drink 'spiking' are due to the use of the drug Rohypnol.
Fact: Most sexual assaults involving drink 'spiking' are due to additional amounts of alcohol, not the use of Rohypnol.
Myth: If someone agrees to kissing and fondling, that is the same as agreeing to “going all the way”.
Fact: All people have the right to determine what sexual acts they are comfortable with and can choose to change their minds at any time.
Myth: "No" can sometimes mean "yes" – women sometimes play 'hard to get'.
Fact: No means NO.
Myth: If you buy someone dinner and drinks then it is OK to expect that they will/should have sex with you.
Fact: Just because you are buying something for someone does not entitle you to have sex with them. Sex without real consent is a sexual assault and therefore against the law.
Myth: Guys who are sexually assaulted are, or will, become homosexual.
Fact: Sexual orientation is not affected or influenced by sexual assault.
Myth: Males who sexually assault other males are homosexual.
Fact: Most males who sexually assault other males actually describe themselves as heterosexual and are often in a relationship with a female at the time.
Myth: If someone says yes to a sexual act but changes their mind during the act it is OK to continue.
Fact: Consent can be given and taken away at any time. If someone says no to something, stop.
Myth: It is OK to have sex with your regular partner while they are asleep.
Fact: Someone who is asleep cannot give legal consent. Sex without consent is sexual assault.
Myth: Using the 'pill' is a form of safe sex.
Fact: Use of the ‘pill’ reduces the chances of getting pregnant but it does not protect against sexually transmitted infections (STIs). The best products for safer sex are condoms which can reduce pregnancy and contracting STIs.
Myth: It is OK to prevent or stop your partner from talking to any other girls or guys.
Fact: A respectful relationship should be free from power and control imbalances and instead nurture trust and respect.
Myth: Is it really sexual assault if someone does not scream or fight and does not have any injuries?
Fact: Most people don’t scream or fight, despite what you see on TV. They may not have screamed or fought during the sexual assault because they were frozen with fear. This is a common reaction for many sexual assault victims.

Respect & online chatting

Meeting people online can be a great way to meet new people outside your usual group of friends and find other people who like the same things as you do. But meeting people online can be more risky and dangerous than meeting people face to face as it’s hard to know if people are who they say they are.

 

For any situation you may encounter it’s about:

-       awareness of your surroundings
-       good decision making
-       trusting your gut and
-       respecting yourself and others!

 

Remember, in everything you do – it’s about what’s ok and what’s not ok for you.

 

Here are some tips to help you be safer online:

 

  • Don’t tell anyone too much information about yourself like your full name,  address, year of birth, phone number, school, clubs or teams you’re in, or places that you go to a lot as it may give them information they can use to identify and find you
  • Make your Facebook or Myspace profile private and only let your friends in the real world have access to it. Don’t accept friend requests from people you don’t know or you aren’t sure about
  • People aren’t always who they say they are – not everyone is honest and it is very easy for someone to lie and pretend to be someone they are not online
  • Be very careful if posting photos online as people you don’t know may be able to see them. When posting photos make sure that they can’t be used to find you or your family. These images can last forever and may even be seen by your future employers, partners or even your own children

If you do get messages or anything else that make you feel uncomfortable, afraid or threatened then tell your parents or another adult you trust.

 

  • Most importantly – trust your gut! If something about them doesn’t seem right, stop talking to them and don’t make contact with them again.

 

Remember, in everything you do – it’s about what’s ok and what’s not ok for you.

 

 

If you like this Fact Sheet and want to know more, check out our other Fact Sheets:

 

 

Information from ‘Love: the good, the bad and the ugly’, ‘theline.gov.au’, ‘Get the facts’, ‘Protect your kids online (Australian Bankers Assoc.)’, ‘Safe Sexting: No such thing (NSW government), ‘kidzworld.com’, ‘Cybersmart, Aus government’.